Here come the boys! Girls - it's what you asked for. Hot male flesh for you to drool over. Dive in!
Caleb Shinobi, 26, Hawaii, USA “I consider myself weird, and I’m OK with that! I once saw a girl take a full bottle of beer up her vagina, and then release it completely empty, which I thought was brilliant! I’m the proud owner of a Prince Albert piercing. Hot girls have been dominating Bizarre for too long – now it’s our turn!”
When we asked what you wanted to see in our Reader Issue, thousands of you asked for fresh, hot boys! So here you are. Our pick of the hottest male models in existence. Know different? Comment below or email us at firstname.lastname@example.org
Mr Bitch, 22, Arizona, USA “I’d describe myself as anal, sticky, fertile, Italian, paranoid – and a curious little monkey! I’m into music and my top bands are Danzig,Misfits and Gallows. I also love a cold beer and hanging out with my family. Some people like to role-play, and others are into poo-poo and pee-pee, but I just like boobs.”
Flawed_By_Design, 22, Denver, Colorado “I’m a corrections officer, a frequent club-goer, and a sexual deviant – that’s why I have ‘Breed to Death’ tattooed on my crotch! My weirdest moment so far was when I came to the realisation that giraffes are robots. What purpose would a real giraffe serve? There was also that time I walked in on my parents...”
Rev Mitcz, 31, Hollywood, USA “Let’s pretend I’m a mystery, wrapped in a riddle, and sautéed in an evil sauce. In reality, I’m a goofy comedian with a lust for dark imagery and gallows humor. We need more devoted male alt.models. Mainstream work is so fuckin’ monotonous. It says, ‘Oh, look at me! I’ve got perfect skin!’ I say, ‘Go get some scars, pussy.’”
Demondaz, 39, Kent “My weirdest moment was seeing The Killing Fields in Cambodia, after eating an ‘extra happy’ pizza, which is apparently a local speciality. I run some pretty good vampire and steampunk events in London – good clubs with good music and good company really float my boat.”
Markabre, 26, Essex “I’m the most cunning cad to crawl from Caligari’s cabinet. As my moniker suggests, there’s a macabre influence to my look, but it’s the spit, sawdust and greasepaint of vaudeville, circus and carnival rather than clichéd graves and ravens. I want sex, fame and riches – and I want them now.”