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Pubic flair - Creating a lady garden that could win Chelsea Flower Show

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Posted in Uncategorized on August 19, 2008 at 5:17 pm

‘Allo dollboots,

Our Chief Sub Eleanor is as succulent and sizzling as a chilli-basted piglet on a spit, plus she knows more about metal than an aluminium specialist - prick up your ears, as you’ll be hearing much more from her in future. Today, though, she claims she was searching for a hot water bottle (in August? Yeah right…) and came across some ‘Betty Beauty’ pube dye. I am now considering redecorating my downstairs reception area in a vibrant shade of pink. Well, always nice for the collar to match the cuffs, huh?

In the past I’ve stuck bindis and diamante jewels down there, shaved it into a heart shape, used henna, glitter and temporary tattoos, and even whipped the lot off and stuck false eyelashes on instead. So do you lot have any excellent tips on how to make your bush stand out from the crowd? Anyone ever tried (or know how to make ) a merkin?

Foxy xxx