Hollywood is very fond of two things: trying to cash in on another film’s success, and playing fast and loose with historical accuracy. Which is why 300 – a film about the Battle of Thermopylae in 480BC, in which a small band of Spartans did battle against a vast invading army – is a Godsend to any savvy producer. Based on Frank Miller’s fantastic comic, it’s been shot in the exact same way as his last big hit, Sin City – on green screen, designed frame by frame to look identical to the source material. Best of all, the historical accuracy has already been thrown out of the window by Miller himself, whose comic portrays Persian king Xerxes as an 8ft-tall bondage freak, leading an army of mutants, elephants and yes, really – ninjas into battle in Ancient Greece.
Of course, if you’re going to nitpick about such things, you’ve missed the point entirely. This is pure, fetishist fantasy, with enormous musclemen doing battle against every manner of stylised perversion imaginable. And it looks incredible. Blood drenches every scene, the screen constantly crammed with so much violence, madness and unusual body-piercing that the dialogue – curt, dry and spurting excess testosterone with every word – is pretty much unnecessary. Gerard Butler, in particular, is brilliantly fierce as Spartan king Leonidas: his neutral American accent gives way to his natural Scottish every time he has to shout (which happens a lot), making him even more believable as an ancient warrior – after all, when was the last time you saw an American brandishing a spear?
It’s still a very American film – a group of buff blokes shouting ‘freedom’ a lot while butchering everyone who looks a little bit different – but don’t let that deter you; it’s more fun than everything else out there right now. And it might just give you a few ideas about what to wear to your next fetish party.
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