Frank Sidebottom was one of the most influential British comedians of the past 20 years. The papier-mâché-headed light entertainer was a precursor for the surreal, homely humour of Vic Reeves Big Night Out, Frank’s numerous TV, stage and radio appearances also helping launch the careers of Mark Radcliffe, Chris Evans, John Shuttleworth, Caroline Aherne and many others.

He appeared at 2009's Bizarre Ball, stunning the crowd with a selection of BRILLIANT covers. On Monday 21st June 2010, Frank's creator, Chris Sievey, died at Wythenshawe Hospital after collapsing at his home in Hale. Bizarre's thoughts are with Chris' friends and family.

We’ve missed you, Frank. Where have you been?
The thing is, me mum made me get a proper job. She found out I was in showbusiness and went up the wall and across the ceiling! So I got this fantastic job working for the company that makes . One of the shows I wrote, ‘Pingu’s Bedtime Shadows’, won an award in New York, but I couldn’t collect it cos I had to tidy my bedroom. Anyway, I thought, if I can win awards I should be doing my own stuff, so I’ve been making animations again, secretly, in the shed at the bottom of my garden.

And now it’s time to unleash them on the world! I’m also going to release a new LP and do more fantastic TV shows. And I’ll be shopping for my mum at the same time, obviously.

Aren’t you worried your mum will find out?
I’ve told her it’s just a bit of a hobby, you know? She thinks I’m only dabbling in my spare time, so I won’t do an interview for Women’s Weekly or People’s Friend cos she reads them - when they call, I just stick my hand through the letterbox and shout, ‘No comment!’

Are you concerned about being a celebrity again? It’s a lot different these days, what with the paparazzi and Heat magazine…
Nah. I’ve got my own camera, so I can just take pictures of myself - I don’t need them to do it. There’s a photobooth in the 24-hour Tesco, and I can get a picture done there any time.

You’ve been playing a lot of live shows recently. Are you happy to be back on stage?
Oh, I do like having a good singsong. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but a lot of people who write good songs never come down your local, do they? Not mentioning any names, but people like Coldplay… you never see them in the pub. And the thing is, I can be in bed before they’ve even started. Look at that Franz Ferdinand – I’m already home and he’s just getting out of bed, shouting, ‘Mum! Mum! Where are my fantastic stage trousers?’ And she’s like, ‘Franz! I put them on the back of the chair!’

And those Arctic Monkeys, they’re out all night and have to come home on the back of a milk lorry, don’t they? But I can do my singsong, and I’m still home before eleven. And now they’ve got 24-hour Tescos, mum thinks I got all her shopping during the day. Brilliant, eh?

What songs are you covering in your new show?
I did a college show the other day and played ‘Frank Sideybum’, which is my cover of the Arctic Monkeys’ ‘Mardy Bum’. They loved that. Mum just thinks my songs are stupid. If she hears me singing in the bath at the top of my voice, she’s like, ‘Shut up, will ya? Just have a wash!’

Have you written any new songs?
I’ve written a fantastic song for my new LP called ‘Sea Monkeys On Mars’. I don’t know if you’ve ever seen a Sea Monkey, but they’re dead small, like an amoeba but a little bit bigger. You need a microscope to see them, so I’m building a giant one out of pipe cleaners and wire so they’ll look really big, like monsters.

Why Sea Monkeys?
They’re amazing! You can buy a beach house and fill it up with Sea Monkeys, and as long as you don’t get the floor wet they’ll stay dormant for millions of years, like dinosaurs or something. So they’re like prehistoric things from the past, or time travellers waiting to come back. But they don’t look like monkeys, unfortunately. They look like shrimps. But you couldn’t sell ‘Sea Shrimps’. Sea Monkeys sounds better, doesn’t it? Whoever came up with that idea is probably a millionaire, even though we could sue him under the trade descriptions act. But I suppose he could’ve been cross-eyed or something and thought, ‘Blimey! That’s a monkey! Living in the sea! I’ll call it a Sea Monkey!’ And his mates probably rib him about it all the time - ‘Ha ha! You called a shrimp a monkey!’ He’s probably dead embarrassed.

Given their ability to survive, do you think Sea Monkeys would be the only living thing left after a nuclear war?
I think the Sculptured Slipper Lobster and Flathead Locust Lobster would be best suited for surviving a nuclear winter. You know how normal lobsters have dead long bits coming off them? These are like something off . They look like an alien ship that’s battle equipped. If a big bomb goes off near a shrimp, that’s the end of them. But the Sculptured Slipper Lobster and Flathead Locust Lobster are ideally equipped. They’re like an armadillo, but with nothing showing.

Do you think a war for control of the post-apocalyptic landscape would erupt between the Sculptured Slipper Lobster and Flathead Locust Lobster?
Nah - if they had a problem with each other, they’d have had a scrap years ago.

It’s good to see Little Frank is still with you. But what happened to your other puppet, Little Denise?
Her bottom bit’s still about, but the head got nicked in, ooh, 1989 I think. I got a ransom note, and they sent some photos holding a water pistol to her head. But I didn’t want to give in cos it’d just be opening the floodgates, wouldn’t it? They’d start nicking everything. I do Denise’s voice anyway, so I don’t need the head. Anyway, it makes things easier cos I don’t have to touch up her make-up all the time. You know what women are like.

Doesn’t Little Frank miss her?
He can’t - he’s only cardboard! As far as he knows, she’s still there.

Since your comeback, your stuff has started to demand a high price on Ebay. Do you ever take part in online auctions?
Me and Little Frank were locked in a big battle on Ebay the other day. We were both bidding for Planet Of The Apes on Betamax. It was a 10-day listing, and I was sat there for 10 whole days! Little Frank went first with a penny, but then I went in with two pence. But then he went straight in with three pence. Blimey, I thought! So I had a look around and found another penny, and decided to go up to four pence.

This went on for 10 days, and at the end it was up to 33p. But in the last minute I bid 34p and it said, ‘You have won.’ Brilliant! Then Little Frank said he didn’t want it anyway! But it was alright, because we were only playing Ebay. Do you do that with your mates? You just Sellotape something to your telly and write ‘Ebay’ on the screen in felt tip. Then you just sit there for 10 days making bids - it’s great! You don’t have to lose any money. It’s for one to 100 players or whatever, depending on how many you can fit in your house. I should sell it in a box – four felt tip pens to write Ebay, a roll of Sellotape and the rules. I could clean up. I’d just need a box that’s the right size. A shoebox painted white, with ‘Ebay - for players One to 100’ written on the front. I could sell it on eBay! Fantastic!

Finally, Frank, how come you look so youthful? All your original fans have got chubby and lost their hair, but you’re still a fine figure of a man…
Well, I don’t use black paint on my hair, if that’s what you’re suggesting, sir! It has its own natural shine, I’ll have you know! Anyway, all that shopping keeps me fit, carrying those heavy bags. I never use a trolley - I carry them by hand every day and I love it. Well, I don’t actually, but it’s nice getting out of the house.

Even if it’s the Sunday shop and you’re buying washing power, potatoes, squash and washing up liquid, would you still not use a trolley?
No, but a tortoise would be good. You know, one of them giant ones like they have in the Galapagos Islands? That would be fantastic, cos you could just meander along without a care in the world, and the tortoise wouldn’t care cos its shell weighs a million tonnes or something. You could even ride it. ‘Giddy up, tortoise!’ That’d be fantastic, that!

RIP Frank.